Some couples may be having a hard time with day-to-day life together but have not decided to throw in the towel just yet. They are not ready to seek a permanent separation and/or divorce, giving up on all that they have done to create a home together. However, living in close quarters may have become very strained and they may decide that one will move out temporarily while they try to work things out. During this time, they may choose to see a marriage and family therapist together and/or work on their own specific issues with an individual therapist.
This trial separation will require some decisions such as how they will handle the additional financial constraints associated with a second home, as well as ensuring each parent will have time with the children, in those cases where they have children. Spouses may also want to work out some ground rules as to the time they will spend together, what this temporary/trial separation means to each of them, how they will handle their social life while living apart and how this may affect long term plans of getting back together again.
Mediation can be the perfect setting for couples to work out all these issues as well as any others that they may be concerned about. At the request of the parties, the mediator will prepare a written agreement that the couple can sign, so that they each have, in writing, the terms of their trial separation.
This time will allow both spouses to rethink how they want to go forward with their lives at the end of the trial separation. Hopefully, they can start rebuilding their life together, but if they feel that they are unable to do so, they can come back to mediation to work out the terms of their permanent separation or divorce. At least they will go forward knowing that they tried their best to work things out.
If you have any questions about a trial separation, feel free to call us so that we may help you with this transition.
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jennifer safian. divorce and family mediator divorce and family mediation upper east side of manhattan (nyc) new york, ny (212) 472-8626 firstname.lastname@example.org connect on