{3:24 minutes to read} Following a complication during a simple medical procedure that I had a while back, I ended up a “prisoner” in a cardiac ICU (Intensive Care Unit) for a few days.

An ICU with A View by Jennifer Safian(No worry, I am doing fine!)

At the onset of the crisis, I could barely focus on anything around me. I was overwhelmed by:

  • IV drips
  • Beeping monitors
  • Medications
  • Endless numbers of nurses, residents and doctors that assailed me with tests, questions and examinations

I was so fearful and anxious about what was happening to me that I was not able to think about much else. As my condition improved, however, I became more aware of the space I was in: a room with two opposing glass walls.

On my left, huge windows looking onto the East River and beyond. On my right, oversized glass doors with a whole different perspective of the world:

  • A large nurses’ station
  • Constant passing of medical personnel
  • Stretchers transporting people to and from different destinations
  • Fellow patients taking a few steps while dragging along IV poles and apparatus linked to beeping machines

When I became ambulatory and was encouraged to started walking myself in the hallway, I noticed that it was lined by glass doors similar to mine, looking into other patients’ rooms. I almost felt like I was on the set of a television medical series. But this was not television, this was real life – people fighting to recover from heart attacks, open heart surgeries, or other medical traumas. It was terrifying. So many breathing tubes, ventilators, transfusion drips and other contraptions unknown to me.

I began putting my own drama in perspective and though I had a couple of difficult days, I realized how lucky I was that I would soon be leaving this place to resume my normal life.

As I was reflecting on this experience, I compared it to that of many people who feel trapped in an emotional crisis. While in the midst of the crisis, they are unable to see beyond it. It is like being tied to wires that cannot be untangled, feeling unsteady and needing to hold on so as not to lose their footing, with their only view being towards the inside of an ICU.

But there is that other glass wall.  The one that leads to the river, the outdoors, the light, the hope. And that is the one we all need to focus on.

So while in the midst of a life crisis, keep in mind that it is but a transition, a passage to better days just waiting for us.

Do you remember ever feeling prisoner of your own personal drama?

Jennifer Safian

jennifer safian. divorce and family mediator
divorce and family mediation
upper east side of manhattan (nyc)
new york, ny
(917) 881 5206
jpsafian@gmail.com
Jennifer Safian