“Nothing good ever comes out of hurry and frustration, only misery.”

                                                                                 ― Auliq Ice

{2:42 minutes to read}  There are times when spouses make decisions regarding their assets, which they later regret for a variety of reasons:

  • They want the process over and done with.
  • They are afraid of being bullied and think that being generous will make things easier.
  • They want to avoid a big battle which could end up in court.
  • They want to part on good terms because they will be co-parenting and they would prefer a friendly relationship with their former spouse.
  • They feel guilty and think they should compensate their former spouse.

Later on, they feel angry and realize that they should have been less generous.

What can be done?

In mediation couples will ask if, at a later date, they can go to court to make changes to their agreement.

The truth is, the courts are not too happy to have people knocking at their door because they changed their mind. If the party can prove:

  • Mental incompetency;
  • Inability to understand the nature of the agreement;
  • Force through fraud, extortion, or duress; or
  • Wrongful conduct by the other party;

One may be able to seek a hearing in court to cancel the previous agreement.

If, however, a party says they changed their mind, gave up too much because they were under stress due to the divorce, or “just because,” a court may not be willing to take those excuses into consideration.

Do it right the first time!

When making decisions with a spouse regarding the sharing of assets, do not rush into a decision just to get it over with.

Once you have made your decisions, think things through carefully. You do not have to make all the decisions in one day. Sometimes taking a little more time may seem like too much to you, but better to spend a few more hours now on your agreement, than rush to a conclusion that you may regret later.

What may initially seem like a waste of time could end up being the best investment you ever make. Remember, some of these decisions will impact your whole life.

“Peace never hurries. To rush or force is contradictory to the very essence of peace.”

― Alaric Hutchinson, Living Peace

Jennifer Safian

Jennifer Safian

jennifer safian. divorce and family mediator
divorce and family mediation
upper east side of manhattan (nyc)
new york, ny
(917) 881 5206
jpsafian@gmail.com
Jennifer Safian

Latest posts by Jennifer Safian (see all)