I invited Rachel Moheban, a therapist who works with couples and individuals, to share with us some thoughts about the difficulties that people may experience after a separation or a divorce, and how she can help them in the recovery process: 

Breakups can be difficult depending on the length of the relationship and how serious it was. The thoughts and feelings that people generally experience may be feelings of loss, rejection, sadness, anger and other feelings that are associated with the mourning process.

This may sound dramatic but it is not an unrealistic feeling as those who have experienced, or those who are in the midst of experiencing the breakup of their marriage or a long-term relationship, could vouch for.

Couples tend to build their lives around each other and when the relationship ends, so do feelings of security and certainty about the future.

Here is relationship advice in healing yourself after your breakup: 

  • Grieving– accept that you need to grieve. Going through the grieving process is essential and completely normal. Allow yourself to grieve for a healthy amount of time before moving on with your life.
  • Learn the valuable lessons from the relationship– You want to ask yourself, “what kind of relationship did I attract to myself?” “What kinds of issues did we have?” “What did I contribute to the relationship positive and negative?” Be cognizant about lessons that you learned from the relationship and your own inner growth and development.
  • Moving forward– once you’ve rebuilt yourself, you are now ready to find your real true love. Set an intention and make sure you are breaking old habits and attracting new and improved partner’s/relationships based on lessons learned. 

As we heal and learn lessons from our past relationships, we can attract a healthier partner and can enter into a more evolved relationship.

Rachel Moheban, LCSW
New York, NY 10001
917 273 8836
Rachel@TheRelationshipSuite.com

Jennifer Safian

jennifer safian. divorce and family mediator
divorce and family mediation
upper east side of manhattan (nyc)
new york, ny
(917) 881 5206
jpsafian@gmail.com
Jennifer Safian

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